Torment of the Denied.

Thursday continued the trend of the last week, certainly of the last 5, easily summed up in one word…


i had thought that my piecework was all done, but the ongoing challenge in being their #1 worker, the “go-to” girl…is that i often get phone calls saying they need me to finish this or that job. And i had thought i was “done”….but the phone rang and there was nilla, herding kids into the car and heading out again.

And it’s good money; who turns down work in this economy, right? And i’ve taken on a third part-time job, and am learning the ropes on that one. And. Wow.

Didja read aisha’s post today? It’s all about stress and work and letting go and breathing…and finding that elusive quiet place.

And i think about trying but don’t see how because i’m so fucking busy for every moment of the day. But my wifes tv show sent me to bed early (nilla does not like vampires, despite liking being bitten!) and i used that time to do some reading i needed to do, some emailing i needed to do.

And i had time to just be in a little peace bubble. Yes, i was doing something, but a task i *wanted* to do, as well as needed to attend to.

So, you’re looking at the title and going “so nilla, what the fuck does all this angst have to do with the title?”

Ha. See, i’m circling around to it. Thursday, as you may remember is ZNN Day (Zero, Nada, Nyet–no touching, no playing, nothing!). And for whatever reason, despite an incredibly full work week, life week–despite an intensely explosive orgasm on Tuesday AND Wednesday…i was horny as hell all day.

Can’t explain it. Last week when i was so tired, i was not horny all that much (well, normal horny, i guess?? i know, wtf is “normal horny”…).

Tuesday night i had a huge pair of O’s danced to His tune (He set up the parameters…clamps on nipples, teasing the clit for so long, even to the speed on the now famous Dildo Dan…). That first O came fast, and the second, at His insistence on increasing DD’s power, came even harder (squirting everywhere) than the first one.

Wednesday was an exact repeat, but yanno? Our bodies are wired so the same stimulus doesn’t always have the same results. Everything was the same, clamps, vibe speed, everything.

Once more the first O was fast. Not squirty, but not far from it either. Then ramping DD up to full power, i got squirmy, and al-most there…..and it faded away.


and i kept fucking and working it, and it was getting closer.

and closer.

and yes…almost there….

and fade.


Are you KIDDING me?

i am mad now, and gritting my teeth. Coz the one difference was that i HAD to have this 2nd o done by 9:59 pm (His way to get me to bed early!). Yet i had plenty of time, making my way upstairs by just past 9, and going right to bed.

But not to sleep, mind you!

So there i am, gritting my teeth and working like a fury trying to cum. And i’m teasing, and tweaking and pulling my nipple chain and squirming.

But i just couldn’t get up the fucking hill to the other side.

But there was no fucking way i was giving up the fight.

Now it’s a matter of pride. Of perseverance.  Of guts, for glory.

Okay that last bit might be too much…but not by much!! I was fighting tooth and nail (gee, can i get any more metaphors stashed into one blogpost??!!) for this danged orgasm, and my pussy was not going to win.

Or …was going to win?


It finally happened. The just-right combo of sensation, of clenching, of timing…i was dripping sweat, my hand was cramping, i was so tired. So tired.

And i came and it was GINORMOUS.


It was almost life altering. I howled, i keened, i’m amazed no one called 911 for the woman making all that noise. Nor did it disturb wife and kids.

When i could see again (who knew you really go blind?? *giggle*), i dialed Master. I couldn’t see all that good and had no idea what time it was.

I still sounded like i’d been running laps, and He asked me if i had called Him to pant in His ear like a winded something. I don’t remember what unflattering thing He said, but it made me laugh.

And i don’t recall stopping laughing for however long i spoke to Him. And i don’t recall the entire rest of the conversation. Total blank. He told me later He could tell i was high on cumming.

And thank God for ZNN, since it was more than obvious that i needed it, after tormenting myself that way.

45 minutes it took me to reach that second cum. Three quarters of an hour, laboring for satiation. Talk about a greedy slut, eh? But i didn’t give up!

Last night was terrible hard for me. So horny, so needy. Sometimes on ZNN, especially when i am tired and it’s late, i get a bit dry. Not last night. i was soaked. Dripping. Incredibly turned on.

So i called Him. Maybe i wheedled a bit for an O.

(right, as if that would help)


And He began teasing me. Tormenting me.

well, little girl, if you are that wet, then be sure, absolutely sure, that you don’t think about your throbbing, wet pussy. Don’t think about My cock pushing in and out of there, gosh, that would be terribly arousing.

So don’t think of that.

And I’d be sure to put Dildo Dan out of your thoughts, too, slut. All that humming against your clit, like last night? Gee, nilla, the thought of that could almost make you spontaneously combust or something!

So don’t think of that.

And whatever you do, don’t think of my mouth on your pussy. Oh, gawd, don’t think of how hard I suck your clit, how my tongue stabs into your hole, tasting your juices.

That would be *awful* nilla. Don’t think of that at all, okay?

And i’m squirming and writhing, and moaning. His voice is like liquid silk…husky and sexy and such a damned turn on. i can feel ‘pussy honey’ streaming from me, and i moan at Him, making Him chuckle.

And He goes on. It goes on for quite a while. Until i’m ready to cum from His voice.

And then He says

beddie bye for the little girl. phone off, and go to sleep.

As. If.

Is it any wonder i dreamed about sex all. night. long? Dream after dream about sex. And woke up just as horny, if not hornier, than i went to bed.

He’s a sneaky Dom, my Master. All i can say is thank gawd tonight is Friday Night Fuck!

(yes, You’re reading this a day late…!)

9 thoughts on “Torment of the Denied.

  1. LOL… Wolf says “And just how did you think this was going to work out?” He was reading over my shoulder and laughing. Laughing a lot. We must never let these two men meet. They’d trade stories, ideas, plans and then we would be in so much trouble…

    • it was good. but then right back on ZNN…but the funniest thing…afterwards, when we were just talking and flirting, i was playing with myself, and right on the edge of another O…and He breaks into the convo saying “STOP…stop touching yourself right now, you little slut!!”

      i swear i was being careful with my breathing, and He *still* knew…so i drove myself to the brink of cumming….and got slapped with a “cease and desist ZNN”….and no O Saturday…so i’ve been thrumming for two days now…(tho, see what i wrote to Bill…i had an O in my sleep, hands free…a verrah powerful dream!)


  2. Oh, a meeting of the Doms! Maybe we need to start a blog just fir Doms to discuss the ideas that really work Glad you had some relief and Hope you have a better weekend!

    • so far it’s been good. Am having a quiet Sunday which is a blessing. I’m off to can more tomatos shortly…tho…still on ZNN…going on 48 hours now. A brief interruption of ZNN for Friday night fuck…and now back on denial….

      although…He left me with some intense imagery before bed…and i wound up having an orgasm in my sleep (hands under my pillow, not under the sheets…as i dreamt of Him fucking me hard….i woke up just as it was over, saying (aloud)…i’m YOURS, Master….


      still processing that little event….

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