He’s a FUCKING Bastard….

Sorry to interrupt your reading of “Felicitations” dear pervie friends–i know i have left you hanging in a most terrible fashion. Not that you don’t expect that of me anyway….however, this time it is not. my. fault.

okay Master, i’m getting to it, really!

I need to back up a few days. To HNT day, actually. You’ll remember that there was a small pic of me at the end, what Master calls a “teaser pic” that doesn’t show all that much ‘stuff’?

seriously Master, you’re SO impatient. i can see you, sitting there at ‘our’ table, reading this ‘shit’ and saying to yourself, c’mon nilla get with it. Fix IT!

You’ll have to forgive these little asides. For as you are sitting and reading this with your morning coffee/tea/cocoa…Master and i are at Starbucks, and He is reading this.

Yes, right now.


I’ve been “tasked” to this particular post, you see. Which is why “Felicitations” has been bumped to tomorrow.  And i wonder if you’re reading faster knowing those two things…that He’s tasked me, and with that title up above there…

Coz, yanno? He really is a marshmallow Mean Fucking Bastard. *giggle*

i’m trying to be serious about this Master, really i am. i see you looking up at me with those stunning, leonine eyes of Your’s, ready to cut me to ribbons with that piercing gaze…keep reading, trust me, it gets better….

So, we, Master and i, were talking during FNF. He was verrrrry tired. About as tired as i’ve ever heard His voice. We talked for a long time, but no playing. It was just…sweet talk

i didn’t say that Master…see? Those are strike-throughs up there.  Everyone who reads here  knows…and understands, that i misspoke…just a wee bit…up there…

right everyone?

note to self….(no giggling out loud)

So we were talking and He was all Dommy and mean, you know how Doms are, right? (grin)  We were talking about spanking and tit torture, and assfucking, and hugging all sorts of other torturous things.

And we spoke a bit about the blog. This blog, not the Dark Fantasies one. And i remembered right then,  that i’d neglected to tell Him my status count for this weeks HNT. So i did that, and then mentioned that i’d said He was sweet.

You know, in the post.

This post…go ahead, i’ll wait. It’s right there at the beginning. And i kinda said it quickly, and kept right on going …and He drew me up short.

“Whoa…whoa…what? What did you just say?” He says in this incredulous voice. And the words “uh. oh” start floating in my head.

And i’ll confess here and now that i stalled told him hesitantly. Coz…yanno. I *know* that tone. Not quite the same tone He used Thursday night when we were on the phone and He was yelling at His GPS lady (He called her a presumptuous cunt!!!) for interrupting Him while He was talking. (Which, btw, made me hysterical!)

But i did, eventually, mutter “I said you were sweet” in this tiny voice. Which He made me repeat, only to holler say calmly “you did what?!”

You did holler, too, Master, but i struck that part out, coz, yanno, I didn’t want people to think you were a total Asshole. Then again…hmmm…that is the point of this isn’t it?    Wait …is this  like one of those stupid math problems? You know the kind, Master…. A train leaves Boston at 9:32 headed for Cleveland, while another train leaves Chicago 4 minutes later. At what point do they cross the equator. It is, isn’t it….??…anyway, i digress…

Now, you all know that Master is a right tough Sadist. You’ve seen the pics of His handiwork a few weeks ago…so you all know He’s rather firm handed with me.

And oh, how i love that!

Love that He takes charge, love that He hurts me so good. But the “sweet” comment? Well,  it’s ruined His “street cred”…who’s gonna believe that a “sweet” guy is a Fucking Bastard?

Who would believe that someone who poured a bunch of sweet on His slut would also do this:

Am i right?

Surely, only the deepest, darkest kind of Sadist would inflict this kind of pleasure hurt on His submissive slut, right?

see Master? did You have *any* doubt that i’d get around to the ‘good part’….eventually?

You know i see You, sitting there, looking up at me and giving me the “Hairy Eyeball” look…the one that makes me giggle nervously…and makes me all squishy and wet …

*big smile*

Must be because i’ve done “IT”…fixed it all up nice and tidy, so that everyone now knows the truth about You…yes? Big Bad Ass Dominant Master of nilla (the slut..wait, i think that’s redundant…nilla is synonymous with ‘slut’…)

Coz really, pervie friends, He is the sweetest meanest most ornery Man you’d ever chance to run across …

what’s that Master? i said it again?

i did not.

it’s a strike out, see? And You know, Master that whatever is struck out is just totally disregarded by my readers. Oh, yes, they grok it.


Whoops, sorry there Master…that one just kind of slipped out.

Yes, You know i am taking this assignment totally seriously.

Oh, BTW Master? There’s a teeny little heart stuck on Your back. From when i hugged You when i got here.  🙂




(He’s not the only one who’s “bad” !)