Such an evocative word, sucks, especially to one from the…slutty persuasion, shall we say? To those of us who love to suck, it is a word rich with nuance…one of service, of pleasure given, and the pleasure we receive from pleasing our partners.

If life was fair (which is isn’t) I would be sucking, this weekend.

Alas, suck has another meaning. One that does NOT mean good things to cum, but that things have derailed, that plans have fallen through, that it “sucks”.

Master has been called out-of-town unexpectedly, and our meet for this weekend has bit the proverbial dust (which is just now covered in almost a foot of snow!).

He isn’t any  happier about it than I am, and it really made my heart feel good to know that. I mean…I know He misses me, but for Him to be obviously unhappy about it…well…it’s gratifying to be missed that way.

He’s been teasing me with this new weapon of His. During the search for holiday wrappings, He came upon an item which has been hiding in His closet, He said, for years. He sent me pictures which I won’t show just yet.

To say I’m a bit nervous about this “weapon” is an understatement. It has a spring. (more thawapping power) It has weight to it. And He has incredible strength with which to beat me with it.

“Master, it….kinda sounds like this thing will make me….cry.”

There is a long, pregnant pause.

Then a “hmmm” sound.

“I’d be very disappointed if it didn’t, nilla,” He says solemnly.


So all of that will have to be pushed out a few weeks, pushed back into the new year. Such is life, my friends. Sometimes you suck, sometimes you don’t.

About vanillamom

For over 8 years--(EIGHT?!) nilla and M have been a D/s couple. I'm the "small s" side of that designation, as he often reminds me. I'm silly and prone to giggling at inopportune times. He's a wicked Sadist, who feeds me my drug of choice--pain. My brain is always spinning dirty and dark little fantasies, which I sometimes share with the world. Welcome to the nilla-verse. It's wet and slippery here...with a dragon or two lurking.
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11 Responses to Sucks

  1. Michelle says:

    I’m sorry, ‘nilla, that does suck – and not in a good way.

    • vanillamom says:

      Thanks Michelle….the only bright lining here is that I had to work anyway for a chunk of the day…when we finally *do* get playtime…it’ll be for way more of the day!

      Thanks for commiserating with me!


  2. SouthernSir says:

    Sorry to hear you won’t have any Master.

    • vanillamom says:

      *sigh* me too….thanks S. Sir!

      I’ve gotten to talk to Him a fair amount, which helped. He was in a very bad mood, until I told Him the score of the Pat’s game…
      (but I still couldn’t weasel an O outta Him.)


  3. night owl says:

    I hit like, not because your plan got canceled but because of the way you used “suck” in the last sentence. It made me smile.

    If someone had told me two years ago that I would soon love to suck cock, I would have laughed in their face and suggested a head examination. Now it is something I dream of doing.

    I am sorry your plans got cancelled. Every moment with a Dom is so precious.

    • vanillamom says:

      nodding…exactly so on both counts…every moment with our Doms, Tops, Masters, Sirs, Madams…whatever your scene looks like, time with each other is so very precious.

      I too was never a fan of cocksucking…until I understood how truly lovely it is. 🙂

      Thanks for commenting night owl!


  4. Wordwytch says:

    I hope you survive the new toy. My brain boggles at what it might be. As for the lack of a playdate… Sigh… You realize of course that at this rate, we will have playdates on the same weekend and between the two of us, we will shake, rattle and roll most of the U.S. sigh.

    I agree, this is major suckage. It is malagrugorous. (dismal) (

  5. Nic and Lace says:

    Sorry your master is away ❤ Had to hit "like" for you writing " *gulp* " hehe 🙂

    • vanillamom says:

      Thanks Nic and Lace, for commenting!

      He is back and we’re hoping to hook up later this month (maybe close to our THIRD anniversary–That still dumbfounds me…3 years already??)

      Thanks for the lovely compliment…you know that you readers make it all worthwhile…and I do love writing!


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