Master says (an emphatic) “NO”

My 11 hour work day turned into a 12+ hour workday on Saturday. On my drive home, hoarse of voice, I called the Man, just to hear his voice and be bolstered on my 45 minute drive home. We were talking and he made me laugh, and you know what just comes out of my mouth right?

“Master? Can I…”

“No. I can’t believe you’d even ask.” (I can almost see Him shaking His head.) “You’re exhausted. You go home, have some dinner, and early bed. Sleep. You need sleep, slut.”

“Yes Master.”

And I did. I think I checked email, but don’t remember. But lights out before 9, then up again at 5 for a shorter work day on Easter morning.

I was kind of freaking out because I heard *nothing* from Him all Easter morning. No morning text, nada. But work was uber-busy and I didn’t have much time to sit and actually fret…it was more of a niggling worry in the back of my mind, you know?

We managed to connect on my drive home, and He kept me giggling as I cruised home at top speed, so that I could run and hide Easter eggs for the kiddo’s while they were still at church. Of course, I asked again.

“Nilla, NO.”

“But Masterrrr….there was nothing Friday, nothing yesterday and now nothing tonight?”

“You got it! Good girl.” He laughs.


“But nothing. You are tired. You need rest. I know you nilla, inside and out. Rest is what you need–and rest is what you’ll get.”

I sigh.

He throws me a bone. Something about begging for an O later. I perk up. And ask…if there might, maybe, somehow be a chance for Sunday night after all?

“NO,” He says, His voice a bit stern. “I said NO for Sunday. Maybe on Monday.”

When He makes up that Master-mind of His, there is no turning Him.

The rest of the day passed in a semi-blur. We had family over, and it went fine. The day was lovely, nice sunny skies, warmth, crocus blooming around the yard. Then evening slid in. Kids were fed, and played a bit more, then sent to bed. The teen on the phone with the girlfriend, and wifey and I playing words with friends with one another. Yes, both of us on our computers and playing. Funny.

(I whipped her butt by nearly 100 points, scoring over 300. 🙂  Yeah, I was pleased. That’s two in a row!)

Anyway, by 8:30, I’m zonked. I get ready for bed, do a 43-second plank (that’s double what I could do on Monday last week when I started!) and slid under my covers. I text Master goodnight and He texts back that it was too bad I was sleepy, He was going to give me 9 0″s.

I jump out of bed and sit in the window seat and call Him.

He laughs, answering the phone with…”…but not tonight slut!” instead of “hello”….

Kind of His “pre-April fool’s” joke.

Instead He put me to bed. Sent me to under the covers, close my eyes, and fall asleep (no touching, slut).

And you know what?

I did.

Asleep before 9 p.m. Slept until 7 a.m. (can’t count the two times I wake during the night…I always do that!

And while I wouldn’t exactly say I was “invigorated” I am at least rested. He really does know what I need. Even when I think I need differently, He knows best for me. 🙂


Have completed Day 1 of the 50 Day Challenge (some people are only doing it through April, but I’m going the full 50 days…because I’m anal that way and I really think it will make a ton of difference.) The planks are the hardest part, hands down. But I remember from when I did yoga before that the core strengthens fast, and if you keep doing it day after day, it really goes easier. It’s a great belly tightener which will help with my back.

So, no dollar in the kitty. And yes, you can laugh at my little one dollar savings; yet that dollar has value to me.  I have a big family, a big old house that is almost a money pit, and I lost my job a year ago when my company was sold and my position was deemed “unnecessary”. It took me 2 months to find one job, and 3 more to find a second one to equal the income I made at the original job; and where before I was only working one day a week? Now I work six. I do not sneer at dollars saved. I work hard for my paycheck, in a blue-collar job. I’m not wealthy, but I’m happy.

I hate feeling defensive about things…about being an “overachiever” for the weight loss/work out, and not wanting to put a “measly” one dollar in the pot as incentive to work out. Let’s be honest here…you can laugh at my dollar, but different things motivate different people- and I’ve been wanting to (and needing to) find an activity to stick to. This gave me that incentive. And heck, I’m going to be looking so fucking fine in 50 days…you all will be green with envy. 🙂 *snap*  Naysayers. 🙂


April 1st, 10:05 addendum

I call Him Monday night as it his late, long drive home night.

“So nilla…how many O’s would you like tonight?”

*dead air*

my mind is whirling. The Red Sox beat the Yankees (in Yankee Stadium, no less!) on OPening Day of Baseball. I had texted him the score while he was in a meeting ( ha ha…  🙂 whadda good slut, eh?) and I thought…he’s rewarding me for their win, and for letting him know. Oh! How lovely. But how many? Four is greedy, three can be a challenge to get to and I’m utterly tired to the bone tonight. Two. Two would be a perfect number.

“Two, Master. I could do two!”

“Well, Two it is, then.”

There is a pause and I wonder with fleeting horror, if He will impose a half-o at the end, just to be mean. But no. He didn’t!

“So nilla…Two O’s eh?”

Another pause.

“APRIL FOOL’s! NO O’s !! NO O’s for the horny little slut! –wahahahahahaha!”

and He laughs, deliriously pleased with himself.

The fucking Bastard.

And dammit. I can’t help it. Hook, line and sinker, he fucking A got me good. Totally forgetting that it’s still April Fools Day. I giggle. Roll my eyes. Whine a little bit.

All while He laughs.

He really is a Bastard, isn’t He?


15 thoughts on “Master says (an emphatic) “NO”

  1. So the lesson my kids got in school today was that April Fools Jokes are only good if everyone laughs and is happy about the joke.

    Mean nilla Master. (Hehehehehe but not unexpected).

    You’re going to be fab in fifty…and I’m prayin I’m right there with you, but sadly mine’s gonna take like 350 I think. Ugh. We gotta start somewhere. As for the money, everything counts. The big thing is having something that motivates you.


    1. As if my reply wasn’t long enough…

      Isn’t it awesome that He knows you, really KNOWS you so well. You two are a great fit.


      1. Thanks Fiona…we really, truly are.


        ps…you can write a comment for as long as you want. 🙂

    2. 🙂 it won’t happen overnight. I know this too. The idea of the 50 is to make us keep on doing it, I think. It will become habit, and we’ll all be moving so much better by summers end….and maybe Master will stop picking on my poor belly.



  2. Hey, you, i’m jealous of your over-achieverness, and like fiona, i’m probably gonna be more jealous at the end of the 50 days! At least i tried planks today, just because i don’t think i even did it right and only lasted about a second ~ well, what can i say? i’m a spankee, not a plankee. {Btw, auto-correct did not like either of those words… It shouldn’t be this hard to be creative.}

    And your Master’s a funny one… 🙂 i’m glad you two are just right for each other!! Sorry bout the orgasms though. 😦


    1. that was a genuinely funny response, too! Fucking auto correct! LOL

      planks ARE hard. elbows stacked under shoulders, forearm and palm on the floor in front, up on toes, back flat (don’t let your back sag into a “bow”….)

      three seconds will become 6, will become 20, will become 45 willl become a minute plus. And it happens fast. Really.


  3. Hi Nilla!
    So where do I go to find info on the 50 day challenge? I googled it, but didn’t get much.
    Poor Nilla, Master got your hopes up. What a mean, mean man.( Husband has that same type of mean streak, I love it! ) 🙂 To be honest, I wouldn’t have figured out he was ‘fooling’. And I probably would have asked for more than 2, I’m kinda greedy. 🙂

    1. Hi April…

      The 50 day challenge is detailed on Sophia’s blog (in my blogroll…sorry, lazy to link today!)

      but here are the basics: every day for 50 days do:

      50 push ups (can be the wall variety)

      50 jumping jacks (or 15 minutes of cardio of your choice)

      50 crunches

      2 minutes yoga plank (straight arm or forearm)

      Every day you miss you put a dollar in the jar. (hopefully there will be none dollars in the jar and a fitter you at the end of 50 days).

      You can break it up throughout the day…in increments that work however it works best for you. Can only do 5 crunches? Fine. Do 5 through the day until you get to 50. I started my planks in 10 second incriments. Trust me, it builds up fast! Already on day 3 and things are easier.

      Hug, and welcome aboard?


  4. Dear Nilla, it was so funny when you thought you got us, wasn’t it. I think Sir B and I need to have a drink and talk about you for a while. Tip

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