Valentine’s Day

I have to confess…I’m one of “them”….

….you know, those peeps who rolls their eyes when people go “OH Valentine’s Day is coming”…makes me sound totally unromantic, but there ya go. The idea of one day as a reason to generate sales of cards (and the associated “guilt gift” in case one almost forgets)…it makes me crazy.

I AM a romantic…but some fucking day on a calendar, so totally arbitrarily created? No.

What if I’m not feeling all lovey dovey on the 14th of February? What if I feel a deeper need to respond on the 13th of March? Or the 18th of June? Or the 3rd of October?

But no, the calendar SAYS we must celebrate TODAY.

*eyeroll*

(in an interesting side note, my computer sometimes arbitrarily highlights text and if I’m not careful to catch it, deletes it. Which it just did, to all of the text after my first sentence…hmmm is St. Valentine sending me a subliminal message here?)

No, really. I’m an emotional girl, but I don’t like to be told by the date on the calendar to celebrate love.

It feels…fake to me, I guess. As I kid I remember, in Charlie Brown fashion, hoping against hope to get as many valentines as the pretty girls. At least as many as some of the other kids.  I was a tomboy, but not accepted with the boys, and not popular with the girls either. We moved a lot when I was a kid, and I didn’t make many friends, since I was incredibly shy. I’d get a few, but it was a somewhat painful day for me. I liked the ice cream we got at the party…but that was about it.

And then.

Last year, Master got me a box of chocolates (yes, the one in my header!) and a card for Valentine’s Day…it was so…romantic…so touching…that it made me feel a bit different. He holds His cards close to His chest, as they say, not letting lots of outward signs of affection show. *I* have learned to read between the lines, and see the love there, but that one little gesture spoke more to me than all the cards in all the stores.

(This isn’t to say my family doesn’t celebrate…my family celebrates MANY holidays, you just wouldn’t believe it. They are truly party people, my family. Me? Not so much.)

So today my mood hovers between “oh gosh, really? That day again?” and “Oh, neat. That’s kind of sweet, isn’t it?”

The path to acceptance is often made clear by Master’s hand.

So thanks, Master.

And, oh.

Happy Valentine’s Day, peeps.

(Yup…that’s the heart box. Direct from Master, and still in my room.) heart

And Yup…there’s another heart-gift, from Master to His slut. 🙂

hearthnt

About vanillamom

For over 8 years--(EIGHT?!) nilla and M have been a D/s couple. I'm the "small s" side of that designation, as he often reminds me. I'm silly and prone to giggling at inopportune times. He's a wicked Sadist, who feeds me my drug of choice--pain. My brain is always spinning dirty and dark little fantasies, which I sometimes share with the world. Welcome to the nilla-verse. It's wet and slippery here...with a dragon or two lurking.
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9 Responses to Valentine’s Day

  1. I also very often eye roll with this holiday, and would avoid it. It still doesn’t hold much weight with me, but any sign of love from my husband makes me melt.
    I’m glad he made you waver for him.

    • vanillamom says:

      thanks cammies….it’s true–I’d rather avoid it…but I also know it is the one day when He will allow me to “be mushy”…so carpe diem, right!?!

      nilla

  2. greengirliam says:

    We (fortunately it’s both of us) couldn’t really care much less about the idea of love and sweetness on a prescribed day. I am the least romantic person going – he is more so – but in a way i appreciate. The best part is that you completely love your Master as is – and treasure what he does – i think people look for trouble in setting up stupid expectations for a day like Valentines when they could find the joy in what’s there. OK – off my soapbox now…

    • vanillamom says:

      YES!!! Yes, that’s it EXACTLY! Find the joy in the here, the now. In the breaths between expectations. In the stroke of a hand on your flank, the scent of them (the ones we love), in the small joys and heartbreaks of the day to day when loving is hard…that is the true gift of love. Thanks greengirl for putting it so well!

      nilla

  3. sexy woman, your comments are going through, just slowly, and I appreciate each and every time you grace me with your words. Thank you

    • vanillamom says:

      Thank YOU…I read your posts…sadly don’t comment nearly as often. My bad, and it’s one of my works in progress! Usually it means a kiddo has wandered into the room and I have to go into stealth mode.

      nilla

  4. Wordwytch says:

    Same feelings here. There isn’t just ONE day we can all be loving. It should be every day. 🙂 sigh…

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