Say Whaaa???

So in my email pops this ad for an online sex shop..not that I have money just now for any new vibes (tho after a 4 hour power failure last night, I’m kinda rethinking the whole “no more vibes with batteries stance I’ve taken…..)…and the headline catches my attention.

I’m going to paraphrase it because I don’t want to cross any lines and get sued…but

New Vibe Sets Just In Time For Mother’s Day


Now, my mom has been gone a long while, but never, ever in my dreams would I consider EVER getting her a vibrator.

I mean…really?

Maybe there are some of you out there that have that kind of totally open relationship with your mom (and maybe because my MIL is 80+)…but this just struck me as bizarre.

Yeah yeah yeah…I know its for men to buy for their honey’s as well as for mommies but it just struck me as a tad surreal.


(oh there I go being all judgy again…!)

But if you and your mom are into this kind of openness, good on you. LMK and I can send you the link….but hurry…it’s almost Mom’s Day…



Face Time Trumps the Blues

I sent Him an angsty text late Friday night. I was feeling lonely and unsexual and unsubmissive and just blue.

He wasn’t up of course; it was nearing one in the morning. I was awake from the pounding rain on my roof, and was restless in my bed.

Over-thinking at one in the morning is a sluts prerogative once in a while, right?

The next morning He sent me a kind note..”I’m used to your mood swings by now, you know this too shall pass,” and that sort of thing. Which was immediately followed by a quick sharp slap.

“Knock it the fuck off.”

I needed that.

And Sunday night we got some face-to-face time. He had a task for me to do (vanilla, yet very helpful to Him) which earned me an O. (Yes!)

He’s taken to a wee stroke of sadistic genius. There have been two “give the slut an O” occasions this weekend. But the caveat is that, if I am too tired to use it, I cannot bank it. And the offer always expires at midnight. It’s a use-it-or-lose-it scenario. I like that. I like having those tight constraints. One would think, going to bed around 10, 1030, that there would be plenty of time. But I have a book I’m reading, and I have puttering to do, and I read on my phone, and start blog-cruising and before I know it…it’s 1130. Or worse, 1145. Or even worse, 12:15. Thankfully, I was able to get in both O’s, making certain that I used it.

A lost O is a terrible sad waste, don’t you think?

And since He is fairly parsimonious about giving them out, I would not want Him to think that they were not important to me…because they so, so, SO are!!

I went to sleep last night with a wet spot on my sheets. And a big smile on my face. Oh, not from the O, or not totally.

During our time together, I managed to tag Him with a wee pink heart, without Him noticing it there on His shoulder.

And I didn’t text Him about it until this morning.

SCORE! one for the slut.