I love watching fashion-y tv shows. My current favorite is one about bridal shopping, but really I enjoy many of them. Not the “rags” type of shows that are one step up from supermarket tabloids (or is it one step down? I’m never sure!) To be sure, I don’t give a fig about the celeb touting some new designer or trying to be the next fashionista. It’s the designers I really enjoy looking for. Maybe because I like to craft myself?


What, you’re thinking…because I know you after all…does ANY of that have to do with a sex blog?

Well, grab a cuppa, or a beer, or whatever, and have a seat. Because in a tiny little show on an offbeat “station” was a revelation.


She was shopping for a bridal gown. With her sister, a friend…


(really, keep reading because this is nilla. This IS still a sex blog. Promise!)

and her fiancee’s wife.


It’s true. Polyamory.  Mainstream.

But wait, there’s more.

She was wearing a collar. Not the current wife, but the almost-wife. Not a dog collar, but one of those ring ones that fasten in the back with a special key. If you ever read Kaya’s blog before she retired it, she wore one.  Here’s a picture:

Titanium eternity collar (lighter than steel + would match our wedding bands).  Allen screw lock.  $150

Okay, I’m not sure that image is exactly the collar, but it’s as close as I could find on short notice on Pinterest (whatever did we do before that?!).

It was, if you’re into the “scene” of D/s, very obviously a collar. The wife wore a turtleneck, likely to hide hers (yes, I was looking to see if there was a bump under the collar but it was just a shade too lose to see for sure. I caught a hint of it, I think, but whatever.

I found it fascinating. The bridal shop people took it in stride, though there was some whispering out of the hearing of the clients, some degree of titillation, which isn’t really unexpected. But she found a dress and was happily embraced by her soon to be co-wife.

I’m stunned–amazed and happily–that it made it to this very popular show. That it was profiled in a positive manner. They didn’t come out and say “love is love is love is love” but it was certainly embraced as an unspoken ideal.

Wish it were that way everywhere.

*pauses, taps lip with fingertip*

Then again, while I’m pleased with the acceptance here, I’m also kind of glad for the clandestine nature of this dirty dark thing we do. It’s part of the cache for many of us, wouldn’t you agree?